REZ DOGS PAW PRINTS 2

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MOOCHING-FOR-MEALS GIG
(Every Rez Dog Has Its Ploys)

Day 2 (Tuesday): At 5:55, a painted sunrise announces a new day of radiance over one of the most spectacular national monuments in the Southwest. Highlighted by cirrocumulus clouds, a winsome blend and solution of pastel colors embellish a nearly cloudless sky: purple, pink, green, and red. Although unseen from the depths of the canyon, the sphere of orange-colored fusion is indeed slowly rising just above the tawny tinctured sandstone rim. In this part of northeast Arizona, cooler ground and air temperature warm up by the minute. Accordingly, a timely silent reveille silently cues The People to awake and greet the new day. Thus, the Diné (more commonly known to outsiders as the Navajo) whose expression, Yá’át’ééh abíní, verbally states the sentiment and reminder. Getting started before the heavy heat of the day arrives is also prudent, for the semi-arid climate and desert terrain encircling the hub of Chinle will be scorched by mid-morning. For those tourists who are not used to extreme temperatures, the aptly-named dry heat can be exhausting. Even beads of sweat on the skin are rare. 

Some 4 miles (6.3 km) south of the monument, a blue-shadowed fissure of sandstone opens wide in this vicinity will get even hotter as minutes and hours pass. Thus, the monument’s impressive and scenic chasm. Long before Canyon de Chelly’s abyss revealed such moving, discernible shadows this early morning, a relative few campers were already awake. From the perspective of rez dogs, these usually friendly visitors personify the early breakfast shift; at least, the possibility some of the dogs might mooch a meal. Other campers who choose to sleep in for another forty or so winks constitute the second shift. These relatively late risers may also provide an opportunity for rez dogs who also prefer another forty (or more) winks. Meanwhile, nocturnal predators prepare for a long day’s snooze, starting with bats (Chiroptera), Bobcats (Lynx rufus), and badgers (the family, Mustelidae). Coyotes, however, tend to linger, just in case an opportunity turns up for a last-minute snack.

As for the opportunistic canines waiting for the first shift campers to prepare breakfast, these representative members of the rez dog community canvass the campground neighborhood and with one purpose in mind: mooching. Each dog also determines more promising campsites. Thus, friendly and generous campers who won’t chase the four-legged vagabonds away. Some of the more providential dogs among the roving scouts might even score two food handouts on two different shifts. On the other paw, some res dogs won’t get anything to eat on the first patrol but will see how it goes on the second go-round. That said, all the dogs know the drill. Namely, how it’s a wait and see proposition as to who among their lot gets something to eat. Besides, there is nothing more to do other than doing just that: Wait and see. If nothing else, rez dogs are as unwavering as they are forbearing how things turn out on any given day.

Presented with yesterday’s meager handouts––if a rez dog was even fortunate to score something to eat––that timeframe is just that––yesterday. Therefore, what is more important to a rez dog is what happens in the present. In this case, the morning rounds are now underway. Moreover, their attention to what’s under paw at all times is useful in another sense: they have no concern about what went before or what follows hereafter. Like all other creatures, consummate concentration is one of the advantages they have over time-oriented humans. In this sense, the rez dog community is, so to say, always on their paws.

Presently, there are some forty dogs in their collective starting to make their rounds this morning. Downsizing their larger force, the dogs separate and canvas different sectors of the campground. This common tacit also entails a first-come, first-served basis. It also goes without saying the dogs have to get lucky finding campers who will provide the handouts. Furthermore, when it comes to campsite selection, from the moocher’s perspective, it’s as though they wait outside fast-food franchises, only the campsites are smaller and without neon signs. On the other paw, sometimes there are too many dogs vying for a camper’s attention at any given campsite and the end result leads to congestion and competition. Therefore, one of two things will happen: either the camper feeds the mob en masse and it’s every dog for him or herself or they’ll hear a rude awakening expressed by the camper or campers: “Scram! Beat it you mongrels. Go chase your tails or something!” 

With such a disappointing outcome in mind, and to try and avoid any congestion, res dogs, as a cooperative community, have worked out a suitable arrangement. Namely, six or seven dogs competing for a handout are simply too many at one time while two or three is optimum. For the most part, this prearranged precept holds true but is not always followed because some dogs are so desperately hungry they simply can’t resist hitting on a camper even when there are too many dogs fostering the same objective. Mooching a meal or a snack is, therefore, a well-practiced regime that gets down to three recommended and pivotal disciplines: tactics, decorum, and strategy.

Essentially, mooching at mealtime not only entails mastering such tactics but also comes down to a res dog being in the right place at the right time. Hence, an implied and dubious fact of common circumstances where the opportune dog in the assembly gets fed. Getting fed is also a matter of timing because numerous dogs have to be in place throughout the day and at certain times for nourishment. Namely, breakfast, lunch, and dinner. However, mid-day mooching is least likely to happen because most campers don’t return until later in the day. Timing also comes down to the maxim: The early bird gets the worm. Simply substitute bird for dog and worm for food, then early for timely. Afterward, the dogs hope for the best outcome. Given this sage advice, there is also an inherent methodology detailing a rez dog à la carte chow-on-demand synopsis. (If interested to read and learn about said methodology, Addendum 3 relates this information.)


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Presented with the fact whatever scraps a camper dispenses, if any, the procedure for the roving res dogs in search for food not only comes down to who, among them, is faster, but also a matter of acute timing. It’s also possible a dog can engender an advantage over another dog or dogs in the assembly, merely by employing enticing mannerisms (read, “tricks to please campers”). For instance, the ability to raise one paw, then hold it steady about nose-high. After, wait for a hopeful payoff. For more balanced rez dogs, using two paws while sitting on the rump works even better while maintaining the pose for a prolonged period. Another trick meant to please and entice the interest of campers could be construed as a bit too much showmanship: simply step out in front of the other dogs assembled at the campsite, then smartly roll over one complete revolution. Ta-daaaaa! This ostentatious performance is followed by an abrupt return-to-standing posture, which is also followed by a wait and see response from the camper. And so, another Ta-daaaaaa! for the performer. Some dogs even commence the so-called let it all hang out gesture. Hence, a rapid rolling motion from one side to the other, with its front paws simultaneously jabbing outward. There’s also the option of repeating such gymnastics for as long as necessary.

Stunts, like these, naturally tend to curry favor with most campers. Ergo, the trickster is often rewarded with a treat or an added portion. 

Conventionally speaking, there are other stunts, strategies, and surreptitious schemes intended to entice a camper to share his or her food. On the other paw, there is Stumpi’s self-effacement tendency and peculiarities that mostly go unseen by campers. Then again, he admits his easygoing mannerism combined with exceptional patience keeps him from stressing over anything. Besides, if he doesn’t get something to eat at this or that campsite, he moseys around the campground until he does; that is if he gets something to eat on self-assured daily rounds to do just that. On the other paw, if he can’t find a camper who will share food with him, then there’s always tomorrow, despite the fact rez dogs are plainly and patently only concerned with the now-present awareness. That said, Stumpi is not only the rarer non-competitive rez dog in the fold but also sanguine and stoical. His equipoise in all things and all ways is also legendary in the community.

For all rez dogs, what they do so well gets down to inveigling a handout, and the more food each gets, the better. On this note, how they manage their lives may seem to an outsider these campsite visitors get what they’re hoping for and counting on for survival. In fact, in many ways, this optimistic observation is inaccurate. That’s because there are always too many rez dogs to feed at any given time. It follows how getting something to eat is, therefore, contingent on a factor of percentages. The ratio of campers to dogs is also a determinate factor given a continuing quest for food. Another contingency centers on the disposition of a camper. Notably, some campers just don’t want to feed the dogs. Consequently, and for a variety of reasons, this inconsiderate attitude is supported by another classic myth. Namely, some campers figure once a dog is fed the next thing it expects is a home. Naturally, such a promising outcome is on the thinkers of all rez dogs. Nevertheless, which, in this case, less is always more (in a manner of speaking), ninety-nine percent of the time campers depart the monument without taking a stray home. The cold hard facts of life also validate the Q.E.D. dictum: not every camper feels obliged to feed the dogs. Even if some kind-hearted campers are tempted to share their food, for one reason or another they resist. Some campers even think or assume another camper will pick up the slack, so why bother to share one’s leftovers with the dogs? 

Nevertheless, rez dogs don’t make judgments one way or the other. They merely drop by a campsite on the assumption a camper will share food with them. If the dogs get fed, fine; if not, they’ll eventually go elsewhere. (Either that or they are run off and forced to go elsewhere.) Herein another quandary is revealed, even though mitigated by the fact rez dogs are sometimes getting fed.

For instance, on this early morning’s rounds, one out of every four campsites in the campground is occupied, which, incidentally, is an average early spring weekday census. Some campers are also getting started making breakfast while a relative few among them are preparing to depart. Since most of the community dogs have been here since sunrise (and most are still waiting for a handout), their patience and discipline maintain. Oddly, Stumpi is among the group––oddly because he tends to sleep in most of the time and misses the early camper’s reveille. Today, however, his hunger pangs overruled his preference for sleeping late. Since he arrived soon after the other dogs were already here, he’s hopeful he will get something to eat, just like the four dogs who are waiting ahead of him. They are also in the front where the action is––assuming there will be action. In this case, a handout for all the dogs in the small assembly.

Situating his corpulent body outside this larger group campsite, Stumpi slouches, waits, and has faith in a common rez dog motto: Where there are lots of campers gathered, chances are better. Thus, getting something to eat. In this case, there is a family of seven about to eat breakfast. This particular early-morning assembly and scenario also beg the question, What are the typical kinds of food fed to rez dogs? The list of items comes down to food preferences most campers prefer eating while on vacation. For example, the following items: 


hot dogs, hamburgers, chicken, fish, sausage (or bratwurst); and sometimes higher-grade meats such as steak, ham or roast beef, and chili. Camp food munchies include chips, pretzels, doughnuts, plain or otherwise (especially ‘otherwise’). Soft food delectables denote a variety of pastries, including Twinkies; hard rolls, bagels, regular bread, and cornbread. Veggies and similar side dish favorites are coleslaw, deviled eggs, pickles, tossed salads, baked beans, potato salad, and a variety of fruit and nuts. Some breakfast preferences include Nutri-Grain and power bars; oatmeal, a variety of cereals (hot or cold), pancakes, and waffles. For dessert items, ice cream, sherbet, and a variety of cakes and pies top the list. 


From the Navajo residents, camper food items are among these traditional Native American favorites:


fry bread, tacos, burritos, enchiladas, mutton stew, hamburgers, rabbits, deer, prairie dogs (all cooked, of course), pork, French fries, squash, beans, corn, and mashed potatoes. 


Accordingly, these lists of typical menu selections come down to a basic fact of life: whatever campers (or the Navajo) eat, rez dogs end up getting the same, even though the most expensive meat varieties are typically not shared (for obvious reasons).

Without a doubt, some of these common food selections are enhanced by different seasonings, and some that are plain Jane preparations. The common denominator given most of these items is heavy on starch, fat, cholesterol, and carbohydrates. For this reason, the selections may be appetizing and appealing to a camper’s tastebuds, yet lacking protein and other essential nutrients. Then again, most camper food selections are not supplemented with nutritional elements from any essential food groups. Rather, the relatively limited menu choices typify a correlation between junk food items, and, therefore, are anathema to a wholesome diet. Naturally, if such food selections are eaten to excess and relegated to a steady diet, consumption, for rez dogs, tends to play havoc with their digestive tracts. On the other paw, the moochers are not discriminatory when it comes to what goes in their mouths, let alone their stomachs. It also goes without saying whatever satisfies a res dog’s craving is graciously appreciated.


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The next aspect of mooching for a meal or snack starts with an exacting question: How to acquire food? Here is where this subject matter tends to get dicey for some of the rez dogs. Therefore, warrants an explication. 

Fundamentally, when mooching food from campers, the rez dog methodology is sound. As mentioned previously, but here more thoroughly explained, if the number of dogs per site is minimal, say, three or four dogs (though one or two is better), and if the campers are amendable to feeding the dogs, chances are each dog will get something to eat. However, when five, six, or seven dogs stake out a site, the odds of getting something to eat are unpredictable. Even a minimal number of dogs can sometimes warrant a strikeout. 

With these facts in mind, what does a small or larger group of rez dogs do to curry favor with a camper? Thus, getting fed? They have one of three choices: either wait and see if the camper will extend the proverbial milk of kindness by providing a handout. Next, a dog may have to compete with other dogs in a group stakeout if it’s one of those push comes to shove situations where the dogs are extremely hungry and somewhat testy. Thus, whoever among the group is fastest gets to eat. Finally, do something unusual that attracts attention to the dog performing this or that stratagem, then enjoy the bounty. Thus, the previously mentioned tricks some rez dog employ to entice a camper’s attention. Any of these options often merits success. However, those dogs who solely rely on beg-fest shenanigans need to get out in front of the crowd, then work the stage as it were.

There are also a relative few rez dogs who do things quite another way. Namely, acquiring an advantage over the others simply by comparing their pelage with other res dogs. In this case, a clean and groomed appearance, which, for most res dogs is rare on the res. Such an advantage over other res dogs also tends to get a camper’s attention, yet is most assuredly a feigned means to solicit a camper’s favor over others in the assembly, if there are other res dogs around. If that’s the case, the onlookers are not amused, though each tends to be tolerant by letting the ostentatious dog do its thing.

Another advantage is whining or emitting a monosyllabic high-pitched bark at just the right time, merely to be sure to get a camper’s attention. Such looks and applied operatic vocal effects will, to quote the adage, melt a human’s heart. A pleading look of a rez dog is yet another advantage, which Stumpi relies solely on this advantage. Then again, he certainly can’t compete with dogs that have clean and groomed coats.

All of these strategies work for different rez dogs in different ways. Each tactic is also contingent not only on timing there is one other critical factor: the smell and appearance of its pelage. On this indelicate subject, the scruffier and smellier dogs are usually given a wide berth, which, of course, includes Stumpi. On the other paw, a rez dog can’t help what its fur looks or smells like. Moreover, groomed rez dogs with no pungent odor naturally get more attention from campers. Therefore, these dogs get fed. Surprisingly, when it comes to handouts by the Navajo, essentially, the sight or smell of a rez dog doesn’t matter, just as long as it doesn’t hang around too long.

At this point in this rudimentary res dog protocol based on res dog rounds and mooching, a caveat must be added. Namely, why some rez dogs may get what they came for while others are ignored. Thus, those who get fed and those who go without. 

Apart from the scruffier and smellier canines, if a rez dog is plagued with a battalion of mites and fleas, then it is very likely campers will maintain their distance. At best, the camper may toss something to the dog, which means pitching food further away from the campsite. The same goes for dogs afflicted with open sores, runny eyes (such as conjunctivitis), or having halitosis so bad a camper can detect the stench from afar. Although some campers may feel empathy for dogs suffering from a host of infinities, compassion, like tolerance, is sometimes more theoretical than practiced. Essentially, what matters for dogs is getting something to eat. Why they are fed and cared for by some campers while other rez dogs are ignored also factors into which rez dog in the community might get adopted. Hence, favoritism and benevolence.  

These mentioned particulars centered on a protocol for rez dogs brings to mind a story about one of Stumpi’s closer friends, Jumper. Conceivably, he was the most acrobatic of all rez dogs within the community. His lively performances for campers were also a thrill to see. Even his peers enjoyed Jumper’s antics meant to attract a human audience. Part Airedale Terrier and Border Terrier, the famed and former show dog  in the community did indeed earn his moniker, for he could spring and jump straight into the air some six feet. Not only was Jumper an impressive acrobat on four paws but he had one of the neatest tricks to snare a camper’s attention. Consequently, getting what he came for: food. 

First, he initiated a studied sitting position, perfectly motionless, and meant to make sure he was the center of attention for his human audience. When this phase of the performance was assured, Jumper abruptly sprang skyward, then flipped head-over-paws. His relatively short legs were also spaced for a perfect four-paw landing. To his credit, he never botched the precise timing and choreography required for this talented act. To see the terrier in action was comparable to a gymnastic competition for one! 

Parenthetically, Stumpi once asked Jumper where he learned how to do this particular trick. Jumper responded, It just came to me. Stumpi was also perplexed hearing Jumper’s modest explanation because he (Stumpi) never got so much as an inch or two off the ground; not even when something suddenly spooked him. As it turned out for Jumper, one day a camper was so charmed by the talented dog’s performance he was invited to go home with that family. Before Jumper left, Stumpi thanked the terrier for finishing the food he left behind, then watched as Jumper climbed into the vehicle and soon departed.

Apart from Jumper’s success and talents, which always netted a bonus handout (i.e., the choicest meats and such), there are a couple of other dogs in the community who also know hot to spring skyward, flip, then rotate relatively high in the air. However, their performance is not what one might call graceful airborne ballet. There are even some res dogs that can repeat the stunt two or three times in a row, thereby securing a camper’s attention. Other dogs, like Rascal, a mix Pug and French Bulldog breed, came up with his variation of the feat and took the proverbial cake when he performed a deliberate miscalculation upon landing, immediately followed by a fake limp. In other words, a noble attempt, yet with an intentional bad landing. After those pratfall incidents, a camper would rush toward the dog to see if it might have been injured. Upon discovering it was not hurt, there was an ensuing and anticipated payoff for the daring attempt: a tasty, which is rez dog lingo for an exceptional treat.

For this exceptionally extroverted res dog, it didn’t hurt Rascal’s chances when he sometimes added one other feature to his well-polished act: after the pratfall stunt, he licked and pulled at his rear or front leg. Following this heart-rendering staging act, came the camper’s immediate response: an outburst of condolence, then fawning over the seeming injured dog. As expected (by Rascal), the camper doled out ample food scraps that mollified the seeming injured dog’s spirits. Therefore, a rewarding finale for his performance; at least, for that campsite where Rascal, so to say, brought down the curtain and earned the ensuing accolade and sympathy from his human audience. 

Describing representative rez dog routines relegated to mooching food from campers, including performing daring tricks and tomfoolery some of the community dogs employ (and merely meant to get an edge over the others), one might assume the dogs can count on something to eat wherever such shenanigans occur. In truth, that isn’t always the case. In fact, some camper spectators don’t get the point. Still, during the high tourist season, chances are better for mooching with or without the tricksters doing their various ploys to win favor over their audiences. Indeed, however minimal the portions any amount of food, including any food item, is better than having nothing to eat. On the other paw, the earlier remark about some campers assuming all the dogs are getting their fair share of handouts is most assuredly farfetched. 

Speaking of fair shares of handouts, once again, Stumpi de Chelly struck out this morning. Try as he might, no camper extended the hand and heart of humanity, so to say, while most of the other dogs did get something to eat. Fortunately, a relative newcomer, Harley, a mix Greyhound and Beagle breed, saw Stumpi near the trash bin, walked over and asked if he had breakfast. Shaking his head, Stumpi said, “Maybe there will be something to eat later in the day.” 

Understanding the hopeful inference, Harley didn’t respond. Knowing Stumpi was indeed hungry, he exclaimed, “Wait here, Stumpi. I have an idea.” Immediately, he ran off. A few minutes later Harley appeared, this time with a large, round cooked sausage in his mouth. Dropping some camper’s entree on the ground in front of Stumpi’s nose, Harley states, “I know I am new in the community but I am learning how desperate times sometimes call for desperate measures.” Naturally, Harley wasn’t repeating a similar phase attributed to the Greek physician, Hippocrates. Still, his analysis of Stumpi’s situation was timely. He also didn’t mention anything about going to a nearby campsite, and when two campers stepped away from the table and were seriously crowding each other (in this case, kissing and embracing), Harley ran to the table and helped himself to the food item on a plate. Explaining the tactic to Stumpi, he added, “They never saw or heard me and didn’t seem to want it but thought maybe you would. You know, eat it.” 

Propping himself on two front legs, Stumpi replies, “Do you? I mean, would you like to have this?” Harley laughs and said his tummy was already full.

And so, Stumpi finally had something to eat and the purloined tasty edible was still warm. 

Later that afternoon, he got lucky again. This time, an older camper lady noticed Stumpi off by himself while the other dogs were eating food scraps; at least, those who were also lucky to get something to eat. Walking slowly toward Stumpi, she made a funny clicking sound with her mouth and said words to the effect, “My oh my oh my. You are sure one unkempt dog but you look gentlemanly and hungry. Would you like something to eat, you poor darling?” Without hesitation, she tossed a couple of cooked hotdogs in front of Stumpi’s paws and continued her soft-spoken greeting, “You know, a dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than he loves himself.” Pausing, she added, “But I wonder who loves you or who once did. Eat up, boy. You may be homeless and pudgy but you still got to eat.”

That night, Stumpi decided not to go back to the lodge and preferred, instead, sleeping where the nice camper lady fed him earlier, even bringing something else to eat: baked beans on a paper plate. Because his teeth usually hurt, Stumpi prefers most soft foods, but that day he had three good-tasting meals that didn’t hurt his mouth or teeth.

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